Snooze-ing

Nobody stopped his phone from 'snoozing'

My life is beginning to become dominated by the 'snooze' function on my phone. Usually i would never use it at all but know i find it physically impossible to get up before at least two 'snoozes', and often so, so many more than are required. Then during the intervening ten minutes between each snooze i have the freakiest dreams, the sort that only a mind in a semi-conscious coma can produce. I think a big old school alarm clock with big bells and no snooze function may be my only option, ideally one that opens the curtains, douses me with water, tips me out of bed and then sets the bed on fire once i'm out of it.